Everyone loves cooking, right? All those pots and pans and sweating and then it turning out looking like a congealed lump of monkey crud. What’s not to like? Especially if you’re the privileged granddaughter of a famous children’s author, right Ms Dahl? As if the world of modeling wasn’t enough for you, now you’re riding the gravy train into the kitchen all the way to the gravy boat. Get a real job. Oh, and yes, I’d tickle her trout!

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