Ohio Replaces Lethal Injection With Humane New Head-Ripping-Off Machine

Head-rip-onion

What with lethal injections not being all that lethal, the state of Ohio has now got to consider other ways to kill off the alleged criminals who are on death row. Some of these include bringing back execution by firing squad or the electric chair, but satirical lol-masters The Onion have come up with their own solution.

Instead of guns or electricity doing the dirty work, The Onion propose an update of the guillotine, with a powerful machine that can rip an inmates head right off his body using a robotic claw in a painless yet entirely gory way.

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