Entries Tagged as 'it's monday'

Monday, April 14th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good weekend? Bed, Bath and Beyond? A quarrel with the wife about what color to paint the bathroom? Kids pestering you to take them everywhere and anywhere but where you want to go? Work is a sanctuary so why not welcome the new week with smiles and optimism. This is what your life has [...]

Monday, April 7th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Imagine if you had a pair of time-travelling moccasins that you could slip on and travel to any place in history but they only worked on a Monday morning. Are you done imaging where you’d travel to yet? Maybe back to Sunday night so you could go back to sleep? OK, well, you haven’t got [...]

Monday, March 31st, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s Monday, which means it’s time to dust off the shin-kickers and arm up for another week of busting balls and cracking skulls and telling Jim from Marketing that you’re not going to stand for his tired bullcrap any more and you want that B2C strategy analysis on your desk by 3PM at the latest. [...]

Monday, March 24th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just like a missing Malaysian airplane, there goes your weekend into the mists of time—who knows where it went or if you’ll ever find it again. But that’s the past now, so quit living there. It’s time to carpe diem and live each moment as if it was your last. And the way to do [...]

Monday, March 17th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And like that, your weekend was gone. Adios. Farewell. So long. And thanks for all the blurred memories. Depending on your age and dependents a good weekend should be like what people say about the 1960s: If you can remember it, you weren’t there. Not even sure that makes sense, but it’s Monday, let’s all [...]

Monday, March 10th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday has come to invade your life like a former Soviet superpower, flexing its might, showing off its inevitability and generally being a massive jerk. But no one’s going to come to your aide, you’ve just got to keep your head down and hope no one notices you’ve done nothing all day but watch stupid [...]

Monday, March 3rd, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sometimes you have to sit back and reflect on what’s important in life, like hangovers, the first Predator movie, why DiCaprio hasn’t won an Oscar (again), whether the Star Wars sequels are going to be any good, and whether that weird stain on the kitchen wall in the shape of Florida is really getting bigger [...]

Monday, February 24th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sometimes the weekend brings with it the slobbish joys of lounging around in your underwear binge-watching House of Cards and eating bowls of deep fried who-knows-what while silently lining your couch with farts—until you remember, shit, you’re a parent and you have a child to look after. Yup, life sucks and now it’s Monday and [...]

Monday, February 17th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Enjoyed Valentine’s Day? Enjoying the Winter Olympics? Well, now it’s time to get back to it, and if that spreadsheet isn’t on the bosses desk by noon then this Monday is going to get even worse than a mild hangover and a general air of melancholy and wishing you were anywhere but staring at your [...]

Monday, February 10th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There’s nothing like a Monday to put things out of perspective—everything just feels like it’s just so crap and why, why, WHY!? But don’t worry, summer’s only weeks and weeks away and there’s nothing to look forward to but endless rain and people being self-righteous on twitter. But it could be worse, you could be [...]

Monday, February 3rd, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whatever you did this weekend, let’s hope you didn’t take a trip to IKEA—never should such a thing be undertaken on a Sunday, traditionally a day to chill the fuck out. Heading to your local IKEA is guaranteed to be the complete opposite. The pitiless, flatpack-laden hell mouth will boil your blood the moment you [...]

Monday, January 27th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nothing good tends to happen on a Monday. Like, why couldn’t Justin Bieber have got arrested for DUI and drag racing today, instead of last Thursday? That way the internet could’ve sprung to life with lolz and memes featuring Justin’s mugshot and brighten up a dull start to the week. Of course, the flip side [...]

Monday, January 20th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Oscar nominations were announced on Friday which means it’s time for us all to bemoan why a particular film we favor or admire isn’t included in the list. And whine about what a bunch of horseshit it is and WHY LORD, WHY has Philomena been nominated when no one gives a shit about it? [...]

Monday, January 13th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s been a week since you’ve been back to work: you remembered how to do you job again yet? Recalled what it actually is they pay you for? Don’t worry, the sensation to weep uncontrollably while looking at the bleak weather and darkening conditions you’ll have to negotiate in a few hours time will subside. [...]

Monday, January 6th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, so now all that festive nonsense is behind us, we can start to let the memories of 2013 fade into nostalgic whimsy that can be mined later on in a few years when we want to fondly look back at the twenty tens and misremember them as not being full of dread and foreboding [...]

Monday, December 30th, 2013

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, you managed to make it to the other side of Christmas in one relative piece and you know what, it isn’t over yet, still one big event to attend before you can settle down to the hum-drum routine life of 2014. If you work you will be happy to embrace the disruption that the [...]

Monday, December 23rd, 2013

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, there’s no denying it now, Christmas is only a few days away so this Monday can’t be all that bad, can it? It could be worse, it could be one of those years where New Year’s Day is a Monday and you have to go in work and the world is just a whole [...]

Monday, December 16th, 2013

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Done your Christmas shopping? No? You mean you didn’t spend your precious weekend lugging your sorry ass around an airless mall packed with zombified consumers fighting for bargains and full of hate, resentment and shit food? And now it’s Monday and you’ve still got to get every single present but you’re probably going to spend [...]