Entries Tagged as 'it's monday'

Monday, July 21st, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you’re feeling particularly tired this Monday morning, just remember that tiredness is a state of mind. In fact the entire construct of reality is a state of mind, so just imagine you’re on a beach with a cold one starring out to the crisp ocean gleaning in the hot sun. Or just watch these [...]

Monday, July 7th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s that time of the week again, you know it well. The time when you have to get up early and commute with a bunch of other people who don’t want to be there to get to an office you don’t want to be in to waste the day away watching videos on the internet. [...]

Monday, June 30th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tell you what’s going to get you through this turd of a morning. Just look up Brian Eno’s “An Ending (Ascent)” on YouTube, put your headphones in and press play and then just wait for the soothing sounds to wash over you, as you journey up among the stars for a few, precious, sacred [...]

Monday, June 23rd, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Christ, is it Monday already again? One minute you’re sitting there watching the soccer because once every four years you’re a fan, the next thing you know you’re on the commute to work with your face in someone’s armpit. Sheesh Monday, you could take it easy for once, you know? Here’s some LOLZ to [...]

Monday, June 16th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So the World Cup’s started already, and while you probably can’t hold too high hopes for winning it if you’re supporting the USA or England—or pretty much any one of the teams apart from about 6 of a total of 32—it’s a time where the world can unite as one… in their utter contempt for [...]

Monday, June 9th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The best way to survive the Monday blues is to pretend like it’s still the weekend, so whatever it was you were doing just continue it unabated. And if the boss wonders why you’re drinking beer at 10 in the morning, you tell him you’re just prepping yourself for a very important client meeting with [...]

Monday, June 2nd, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another Monday. Anyone would think they come along once a week. Or maybe even twice a week, which is what it feels more like. But you know what, let’s not moan about this Monday, let’s embrace its Mondayness, take a leisurely swim in its muted feeling of wishing you were elsewhere. Repeat after me: Monday, [...]

Monday, May 26th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the future Monday’s going to be the new Friday, because in the future none of us will have a job so days of the week won’t matter. Instead we’re going to be 10 feet more underwater than we are now, as the ice caps melt, populations head for higher ground causing mass riots and [...]

Monday, May 19th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, I can’t even. Sunday, yeah OK, I can even. Mostly. Because Sunday’s a day to embrace and pretend you’re going to do all kinds of nice stuff like go to the park and swim with the ducks or go for a walk in the woods and sing to the birds while rolling in the [...]

Monday, May 12th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, Monday, so good to me—Monday morning, it was all I hoped it would be. So sang The Mamas & The Papas, before they came to their senses later in the song with “Monday, Monday, can’t trust that day” and “whenever Monday comes you can find me crying all of the time” because no musician [...]

Monday, May 5th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you lived in England right now, you’d be sat at home in bed because over there it’s a national holiday. But if you lived in England you’d also have to say “mum” rather than “mom” and you’d have to add a “u” to lots of words that don’t need it. Because Brits can spell. [...]

Monday, April 28th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last week brought us a controversial (and, frankly, rather awful) music video from Avril Lavigne, it brought us controversial rape scenes from Game of Thrones and it brought us lots more of those Buzzfeed quizzes that clog up your newsfeed asking things like, which type of lettuce are you? Who knows what this week will [...]

Monday, April 21st, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s Monday which, lately, means you can discuss spoilers for Game of Thrones on the internet for those that haven’t seen it yet—and if there’s one thing to make your grumpy, hungover self feel better on a Monday morning, it’s the schadenfreude derived from ruining someone else’s enjoyment of a TV show they love and [...]

Monday, April 7th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Imagine if you had a pair of time-travelling moccasins that you could slip on and travel to any place in history but they only worked on a Monday morning. Are you done imaging where you’d travel to yet? Maybe back to Sunday night so you could go back to sleep? OK, well, you haven’t got [...]

Monday, March 31st, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s Monday, which means it’s time to dust off the shin-kickers and arm up for another week of busting balls and cracking skulls and telling Jim from Marketing that you’re not going to stand for his tired bullcrap any more and you want that B2C strategy analysis on your desk by 3PM at the latest. [...]

Monday, March 24th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just like a missing Malaysian airplane, there goes your weekend into the mists of time—who knows where it went or if you’ll ever find it again. But that’s the past now, so quit living there. It’s time to carpe diem and live each moment as if it was your last. And the way to do [...]

Monday, March 17th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And like that, your weekend was gone. Adios. Farewell. So long. And thanks for all the blurred memories. Depending on your age and dependents a good weekend should be like what people say about the 1960s: If you can remember it, you weren’t there. Not even sure that makes sense, but it’s Monday, let’s all [...]

Monday, March 10th, 2014

IT’S MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday has come to invade your life like a former Soviet superpower, flexing its might, showing off its inevitability and generally being a massive jerk. But no one’s going to come to your aide, you’ve just got to keep your head down and hope no one notices you’ve done nothing all day but watch stupid [...]