They locked him away. They ruined his legacy. And now, after 20 years he’s about to get his revenge! If only this was the real reason behind those filmic turds that were the prequels then all would be forgiven. And it wouldn’t just be forgiven, but this would change Lucas into the most badass man [...]

The stirring emotion, the rising crescendo of music to accompany the character’s story arc boiled down to a few concise minutes while revealing just enough but not too much about the film in question. This trailer has it all, it ticks every box that needs to be ticked. All it needs is some overblown praise [...]

You gotta fight for your right to get Will Ferrell to play you in a movie! It’s 25 years since the Beastie Boys released “Licensed to Ill” giving people an excuse to be unwell and gategrashing your momma’s house for a party. And now they’re making a film about that fateful time, starring so many [...]

Everyone’s favourite “will they, won’t they” couple (Billy Crystal & Helen Mirren…..Meg Ryan kinda ‘died’?) who love faking orgasms in New York delis, finally get that sequel/remake we’ve all been waiting for where the couple turn into goddamn blood sucking vampires devouring the red bodily fluid like it was beer. Plus Mike Tyson’s in it [...]

In space no one can hear you scream! But when aliens come to Earth & land in a council estate in south London………….God help them! If you’ve ever had the pleasure of spending a Saturday morning listening to the idle chatter of Adam and Joe tickling your hungover funny bones, then you’ve probably just had [...]

If this dream team of viral video megalolz actually finds its way into a finished film, we could be looking at the end of time as we know it. Or is this going to be the greatest rickroll in the history of the internet. The film’ll get made, we’ll all pay money to go see [...]

Since ET’s been away, quite a lot of dreadful things have happened to the earth, like the Jonas Brothers, Bieber. And the little fella loves humanity, he doesn’t want to see it suffering at the hands and voices of irritating pop brats. And of course, there’s the small case of the fang-toothed evil ETs [...]

This is quite simply brilliant. Michael Bay’s version would’ve been particularly amazing, Mark Zuckerberg inventing Facebook on Alcatraz Island to save the internet from exploding and releasing a bunch of mercenary robots who will take over the world and sell our information to corporations. Cue slow-mo and thundering music.

The title alone is worth it for this one, as blasphemy just got awesome. Let’s just take a moment to reflect shall we. We have nude nuns. Check. And we have big guns. Check. What else does a movie need? There’s your ingredients for a night in alone with a box of tissues and some [...]

Finally, it’s here. The tale of a crack-smoking, blood-lusting, crazed raccoon that preys on the residents of the Bronx neighborhood of Locust Point. Forget Citizen Kane, forget Casablanca, forget The Godfather, this movie right here is the greatest movie ever. Maybe. Possibly. Sort of.

To boldly go where no zombie has gone before – Star Trek zombies? Illogical maybe but guided by the power of awesome. As sci-fi/horror crossovers go this could only be improved if it had a scene where Seven of Nine is clam-jousting with Rose McGowan (a leg-over), while Justin Bieber is savaged by Teen Wolf [...]

I was always wondering if they were going to do a sequel. After all once that ship sunk, then, erm, well yeah. Shit, how are they going to do a sequel. Oh, I see it’s 100 years later. Riiiight. Well let’s hope that while it’s out at sea it hits a flying mega sharktopus and [...]

It’s the film web developers have been creaming over their motherboards about. It’s the shocking story of one young man’s love affair with code, and his struggle to take on the giant of the computing world. Emotion, drama, Java. This is going to be the hit of the summer. Javagasm.

I knew those cutesy candy-colored bears had a dark side. I’d definitely go watch this if it ever got made. I’m thinking Martin Scorsese or Abel Ferrara to direct. I want to see bloodletting, decapitation, mutilation, psychologically damaged Care Bears snorting coke, injecting drugs into their eyeballs and going on some kind of cathartic journey [...]

Thank the tentacle-armed ninja god of death that Jackie aka the High-kick of Reason has spoken out against what can only be described as a crime against humanity: Little kids doing karate in movies. Jackie pits violence against a semblance of violence and kicks the crap out of those little bastards. Go Jackie!

The original Karate Kid is back, thank the gods! And there’s no fly-catching Miyagi in sight. Instead Ralph is trying to resurrect his dead career by trying to stop being Mr Nice Guy and head down that well trodden Hollywood path of depravity and self-destruction. Has he got what it takes to go the distance [...]