You have to admire the courage of NASA astronauts, ‘To boldly go where no nerd has gone before!’ The team of scientists says the $19 million dollar mission will put them in direct contact with a woman by 2018. It’s a dangerous venture that could easily end in FAIL!

Irish politics, now there’s an amusing oxymoron (actually, lets be fair, that could apply to any country in the world at the moment), can sometimes test even the most unassuming politician’s use of unparliamentary language when it comes to heated debate – Here Paul Gogarty from the Green Party pollutes the floor with some foul language – GENIUS!

Jokes for dorks. It’s a niche market but this guy has managed to get it dialed down to a precise groan-inducing art form. Jokes about viruses and quantum paradoxes are all well and good but I doubt he’d last long on the comedy circuit…

The big man drops some truth bombs on the twilight franchise, all the while preaching a message of acceptance. Sure, homo sparkly vampires might only entertain 12 year old she-nerds, but in 6 short years they’ll be 18 year old she-nerds…

The Onion nail it again. Macs are for cunts, end of story. Fuck all 6% of you.

The Onion: fucking nailing it every time, since 1988.

Michael O’Leary, blunt talking, foul mouthed, confrontational CEO of implausibly bad budget airline Ryanair explains that his business class air-hostesses will go beyond mild flirtation, to orally induced happy finishes. This is good news as long haul flights are very boring and blow jobs a re a very effective way to combat boredom.