What up, linkjunkies? Yep it’s Monday and that means it’s time for your weekly fix of linky goodness. Get clicking.

• Little Tombstone – Awesome wild west CGI animation
• Amazing Drum Solo – This kid has serious talent.
• Britney Cover – Better than your average!
• Pooh Bear Dougie – A dance lesson for Disney.
• Moustache In Court – It’s not easy being MOUSTACHE.
• Cassetteboy Vs. The News – a BBC news mashup.
• Monday Morning Pic Dump – What were they No smelly crap here!
• The Last Day On Earth – A cool looking disaster movie!
• Aqua Tek iPhone case – It’s even snowproof!
• Boiled Big Mac – Apparently, better than it looks.

A British study billed as “the most comprehensive ever conducted on gender driving differences” has concluded that women are better at parking cars than men. The study, which relied on surveillence camera footage of over 2,500 drivers across 700 parking garages, was devised by professional driving instructor Neil Beeson, and produced by car park firm NCP.

Among its findings: Women are better than men at tracking down spaces, lining up with the parking space, and reversing into spots “by the book.” Meanwhile, men are better at entering spaces while driving forward, and exhibit more confidence than their female counterparts, leading to quicker parking decisions.

“The results also appear to dispel the myth that men have better spatial awareness than women,” said Beeson. “It shows that us men need to give our partners more respect when it comes to parking. The facts don’t lie.”

The study is one of the most comprehensive ever conducted on gender driving differences, and took into account seven key components of parking styles.

Women were also found to be better at finding spaces, more accurate in lining themselves up before starting each manoeuvre, and more likely to adopt instructors’ preferred method of reversing into bays.

Men were shown to be more skilled at driving forwards into spaces and more confident overall, with fewer opting to reposition their car once in a bay.

But once all the elements were taken into account, women were ranked first with a total score of 13.4 out of 20, compared to 12.3 points achieved by men.

Each aspect of a person’s parking was marked and added to a final tally to produce a “parking coefficient” for the two sexes.

The first category analysed people’s ability to find spaces. Researchers found that impatience caused many men to drive too quickly around car parks, meaning they missed free bays. Meanwhile, women’s slower approach meant they were better able to notice spaces, or spot when other drivers were about to leave.

More than three quarters of women were found to excel in their so-called “pre-parking pose”, setting themselves up to pull into a space, compared to just over half of men observed.

Thirty-nine per cent of female drivers cleanly executed reversing into spaces, compared to only 28 per cent of men.

Men were much quicker at parking, taking 16 seconds on average against the 21 seconds women needed to complete the manoeuvre.

However, the extra time paid off leaving 52 per cent of women parked in the middle of each bay, compared to 25 per cent of men. This category proved particularly punishing for the men’s rating as it was the most heavily weighted in the coefficient.

But James May, the Top Gear presenter, last night challenged the criteria of the study, saying that parking in the centre of a bay was not always the best policy – especially if a neighbouring car was parked too close to the dividing lines.

“You have to take into consideration the cars parked next to you – you ought to be judged on how central you are to them,” he told The Daily Telegraph.

“I don’t care what gender the person is next to me, I just don’t want them to bang their door on my Porsche.”

Vicki Butler-Henderson, the racing driver and television presenter, said: “Parking in a space is obviously different to reverse parallel parking, but I’m delighted that the fairer sex has come out on top – the findings ring true from my experience.

“Women do take more time, but I know a lot of male racing drivers who win races and are incredible round a track but can’t park for toffee.”

From the figures, the study concluded that, as the average motorist parks a car 1,004 times in their lifetime, women spend 12 days of their lives parking compared to nine days for men.

The findings contradict not only popular belief but also previous research. Figures from the Driving Standards Agency last year disclosed that tens of thousands more women fail their driving test on parking errors than men.

Researchers at the Ruhr University Bochum, in Germany also found that women take up to 20 seconds longer than men to park a car.

Only one fifth (18 per cent) of women questioned for the NCP study thought they were better parkers than men, and less than a third (28 per cent) believed they were better parkers than their partners.

Article taken from: The Telegraph

Another seven days has gone by and the big story this week is SOPA/PIPA and how after the collective will of the internet being expressed it is now about as popular as a one-legged ginger stepchild. Righly so! Thanks to the pravailing winds of common sense the LOLcats are safe. For now.

Anyway, enough news and politics, time for some links!

• 28 Pics That’ll Change You Life – Truly life-changing
• Squashing – I Feel Like A Pancake – Broken spine time.
• Ostriches: the New Planking – A sport for total idiots
• The Penis Game – Fun for all the family.
• He-Man Dance Party – The best episode they ever made.
• Skyrim Pony Mod – Finally! A reason to play!
• FDR – American Badass – What a guy!
• Thermaltake Level 10 Mouse – Apparently it IS a mouse.
• Moonrise Kingdom Trailer – Royal Tanenbaums, part 2!

With the announcement this week that hit US TV show Madmen will be returning this March, we pay tribute to the king of cool and quintessential man for the 21st century with this article from the site mergersandinquisitions.com, which provides the Don Draper guide to investment banking. Learn how to drink, smoke, womanize, get in big trouble – and make a pile of money doing it.

A few years ago some banker friends and I were thinking about creating a TV show.

Entourage meets The Office: all the glamor of movie stars and the celebrity lifestyle, but in cubicles rather than Hollywood.

But the outside world has never hated Wall Street more, and post-financial crisis there’s no way a drama like this could ever take off.

Plus, there’s another small problem: it would be impossible to make a show more awesome than Mad Men.

Don’t believe me?

Here are all the lessons you could learn from Don Draper himself:

1. Have a Great Name

You cannot underestimate the importance of having a name that rolls off the tongue: “Don Draper” is 100x better than “Dick Whitman,” so it’s no wonder that Don assumed someone else’s identity.

You’re judged on your name just like you’re judged on your appearance: so if your name sucks, change it or come up with a nickname or shortened version that’s easier to pronounce (just make sure it’s done officially so you can handle those pesky background checks).

Some people succeed without great names, but why take the chance?

2. Don’t Hook Up with Co-Workers

While Don has had dozens of affairs, up until season 4 he never crossed the hook-up-with-co-workers line.

And when he finally did cross the line, he hit rock-bottom and found himself more adrift than ever before.

You’re required to have affairs and random flings if you’re in finance – just make sure they’re not with co-workers or things will head south very quickly once it ends.

3. If You Do Hook Up With Co-Workers, Don’t Take the Marriage Seriously

So you just had a random fling with your secretary, suddenly decided that you’re in love, and proposed during a trip to California?

If Don can do it, you can too.

Remember that you cycle through wives or husbands approximately every 2 years in finance, so it’s perfectly fine.

With the amount of money you’ll make, alimony is almost an afterthought anyway.

4. Don’t Take Your Employment Contract Seriously, Either

Don didn’t even have a contract with Sterling Cooper until everyone realized he needed one, midway through season 3.

And even when he “signed” it, he didn’t use his real name and then broke the contract to leave and start his own firm anyway.

The role of contracts in investment banking is similar: they’re just a formality.

You could be fired at any time, or you could quit as soon as you find a better offer elsewhere – so have fun playing the field.

5. Take 4-Hour, 3-Martini Lunches

Has Don ever not gotten a hotel room with his mistress-of-the-moment after a 3-martini lunch?

You think you have to be available for clients and senior bankers 24/7, and that’s usually true…

…except for when you get that buy-side offer and are on your way out the door anyway.

Remember that no one cares about you at a bank: especially when you’re about to move on anyway, do the bare minimum to get paid and slack off as much as possible.

4 hours may seem like a long time for lunch, but if you’re leaving anyway and all the senior bankers are gone, who would notice?

6. If Conrad Hilton Calls You at 11 PM, Do Whatever He Says

And no, not just because his great-granddaughter is Paris Hilton.

If you have a high-maintenance client who’s worth millions of dollars and demands to speak to you 24/7, you better do whatever he says.

That includes getting his dry cleaning, dressing up as a clown at his kid’s birthday party, redecorating his house, and meeting him in the middle of the night just because he’s bored.

Remember, clients and work come before everything else – even if your wife is about to divorce you and your kids don’t remember who you are.

7. Exploit Loopholes for Personal Gain

So you just found out that your own firm is being acquired by a much larger company and you’d never want to work there.

Simple solution: just do what Don did and gather up everyone important and fire yourselves before the transaction goes through.

If your bank is actually getting acquired, the acquiring bank is smart enough to prevent that specific scenario with the reps and warranties in the definitive agreement…

…But there are always other loopholes you can exploit.

Send out emails late at night to feign busyness, work hard during your first and last month and slack off the rest of the time – do whatever it takes to get top-tier bonus.

8. Keep Stacks of Alcohol in Your Cubicle

Bankers may not drink alcohol out in the open anymore like advertising guys did in the 60s, but if you work 100 hours a week you’re going to need alcohol and drugs – ideally cocaine – at some point.

Rather than running out to buy overpriced bottles constantly, keep a stash hidden away in your cubicle.

Once the support staff and senior bankers are gone, you have free reign to do whatever you want.

So if it’s 3 AM and your balance sheet isn’t balancing, just pull out your Jack, take a swig, and hope for a moment of clarity.

9. Don’t Lie on Background Check Forms

Don gets away with assuming someone else’s identity for years, but it finally catches up with him in season 4 as North American Aviation, a new client, demands background checks on everyone so they can receive security clearances.

And if you’ve been lying about your identity for years, background checks are the last thing you want to think about – so Don forces his company to drop the client.

You might think that’s bad – but if you lie on your own background check forms, something much worse will happen: you’ll get your offer rescinded and you might even have your career destroyed with the right chain reaction of forwarded emails.

10. Think on Your Feet

So the government has started telling everyone that cigarettes kill you – and your top client is Lucky Strike.

They put you on the spot in front of everyone else and ask you how to address these claims and market the product.

Simple solution: avoid the issue altogether. “It’s toasted.” – everyone else’s tobacco is poisonous, but yours is special.

Remember that investment banking is a sales job: it’s less about analysis and more about selling, relationships, and thinking quickly.

Even as an analyst you’ll be put on the spot all the time when your MD or VP ask about your work or for specific numbers – so you better be prepared.

11. If You Get Arrested for Drunk Driving, Get Your Most Trusted Friend to Bail You Out

After indulging in alcohol yet again, Don finds himself in a wrecked car and in police custody along with his “female companion” of the moment.

So he does what any reasonable businessman would do: he calls Peggy, the one person he can trust to bail him out without telling anyone else at Sterling Cooper.

You should also have a “designated friend” to bail you out, because you’ll probably be arrested for drugs or alcohol at least a few times.

Just make sure it happens after you’ve already gone through background checks.

Got Don?

While you don’t want to follow everything Don does (e.g. sending a major announcement about your firm to the NY Times without consulting anyone else first), you can pick up a lot from him.

Advertising in the 1960s was just like finance in the 2000s: the most prestigious and highest-paying industry.

And if Don were in business today, he’d surely be a Partner at a bank or PE firm – so watch Mad Men and take notes the whole time.

Article taken from: www.mergersandinquisitions.com

Unless you were chilling on a cruise ship off the coast of Italy, it’s probably been a pretty relaxing weekend for you, kicking back and cringing as Ricky Gervais presents the golden globes. Time to add a little excitement to your Monday morning monotony with some super spicy web linkage!

• Drunken Car Surfing – drunkenness is mandatory.
• Golden Globes Gervais – We want blood!
• Daisy Lowe Is The Best Dancer – Mainly ’cause she’s HOT.
• Future Windows – All hail Samsung!
• Makeup Tips: Casey Anthony Look – How to get that ‘killer look’.
• Eastenders Deleted Scene – Bradley rises from the dead
• Battlefield 3 Panic Attack – MAV will save you!
• Snowman Phobia – Don’t laugh. This is SERIOUS.
• Segway Skates – Don’t laugh. This is SERIOUS.
• The Raid Trailer – Awesome action movie.

In Soviet Russia, burger eats YOU! – They use fast food restaurant as many things. A tattoo parlour, a club where burgers are spun on record decks, where fairies ride unicorns, ballerinas practice their dancing, oh yeah, and people eat burgers there. Crazy. Ibiza at it’s most debauched has got nothing on a Russian Burger King, it’s the place where it’s all happening. Who knows what kind of extras they’re putting in their burgers over there.

Two guys, on their way home from taking some photos at Formula Drift Palm Beach, they found themselves stranded over night in Dallas Fort Worth (DFW) due to the scourge of cancelled flights. What took place that night both men would remember for the rest of their lives. Mainly cos they videoed it and stuck it on YouTube. You’ll never get bored at an airport again.

Behold the power of the voice (and facial hair). Look at this bearded guy, not only can he make some good music but he is so Zen he can control the atomic structure of his body so parts of it disintegrate and reform. Now that is talent. He must’ve spent time with the mountain unicorns of Bhutan where lost arts are transferred to the soul via esoteric tantric rituals under Sanskrit skies.

A simple yet very effective game. Get a friend and then using all those film quotes we all love to spout at each other all day every day, substitute the nouns for the word ‘penis’. And you have the instant mega-lolz. Watch this video and tell me you didn’t laugh. No matter how old we get, the word penis and farting will always be hilarious.

Everyone hates Monday (well, i don’t…but you know what i mean), but what about Tuesday, huh? It’s just as bad isn’t it? Why does Monday get all the hate, distribute it evenly over the week why don’t you. Take Misery Bear he doesn’t give a damn, he hates work all day every day, in fact Misery Bear probably hates his job more than his life. And for that he’s a role model to us all.