Skateboarding is so Michael J. Fox circa 1985/55. It’s all about using live animals now, so go grab your pet, rip its paws off and replace them with some gnarly Bones STFs and then take to the streets and start busting some double flip ollie wing grinders on someone’s face. You will be so street and full of rad that people will mistake you for a concrete bollard. Plus your dog gets its walkies while you get to surf sidewalk. Woof.

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