So Osama’s bin laden to rest and the world is now completely safe from evil and children can skip through meadows of wonder into the fields of hope where daisies chant the holy name of peace on earth for all mankind. Woo and a-hoo! He was the bad guy, right? We are all gonna be better off now, aren’t we?
Osama may’ve been caught, but he hasn’t released a short film parodying the single that launched his career as an obnoxious bratty rich kid singing about partying in a meta-parody of himself that features just about every Hollywood actor who’s ever stepped in front of a camera. And his compound probably never saw the thrilling sight of fat comedians peeing on each other, did it? But this video has all that, and more. And, yes, it might have Mr. Frodo in it, but that doesn’t stop it being awesome!
Deep in the rain forests of the Amazon it looks like the horror of Starship Troopers has finally come true, there is some kind of large smart bug spreading infection amongst the local population and it aint pretty! Scientist Dr Javier Hoolavez has discovered an entirely new genus that has a very distinctive insect bite that changes the genetical behavior of it’s victim into something scary and now it looks like the infection has reached the human population and the virus is spreading FAST!!!
Who knew embryos could skate? But they can, and do so very well. By the time they grow up they’re going to be so good at skating they’ll probably invent hoverboards and maybe even be the first people to skate on the moon. It could happen, anything’s possible. Or maybe they’ll grow out of it and take up model railways, or become president, a far less hazardous pastime.
The scream that keeps on screaming, sound designer Benjamin Burtt Jr. discovered the original recording (it was labelled “Man being eaten by alligator”) and used it in a little movie he was involved in called Star Wars. Being a man who liked to rinse the hell out of something and milk it until it was powder, he then used it in every film he made, including all the Indiana Jones movies. At least, that’s what Wikipedia says.
Prepare to experience awesome! Forget about the filmic turds that are Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines and Terminator Salvation, any self-respecting cyborg would know that this is the true 3rd part to complete the trilogy. It’s quite simply, incredimazing. So good it warrants making up a new word that is a barbarism of two other words. If you haven’t seen the film before (where the hell have you been?): Spoiler alert!
A long time ago, like in the 1980s or something, there was a trailer & it was used to advertise a film. This is the story of that trailer. Not really, this is a bunch of work shy film students trying to make a formulaic action trailer for the movie moguls of L.A. Will they shake the very foundations of Hollywood? Or will they wish they hadn’t missed half their classes down the bar drinking cheap beer & discussing what you call a Whopper in Paris?
This chick is such a badass she can exert control over sharks, the bullies of the sea, balancing them on her hand, juggling them, playing with them like they were a bunch of pussies or sea lions. When word gets out to the rest of the underwater community that sharks can be tamed like this their reputation is going to be sea mud. They’ll be a laughing fish stock, treated like a bunch of clown fish.
These insane adrenaline freaks have an avalanche lapping at their heels like death chasing them, and the steep French Alps in front of them. Surrounded by danger, but do they give a damn, no. This should be an inspiration to us all to go out there and live! To take life by the swinging bollocks and face it head on. Maybe tomorrow though, right now there’s a repeat of Friends on TV.
It’s time for your morning music fix of Euro-techno happy hardcore wake-up call to the power of hard dance, complete with raving mulleted Germans going ze crazy in a motor car. Crank it up real loud, and if you’re sat at work, take your headphones out so the whole office can hear, stand on your desk and throw those hands in the air and jump around like you’ve just double-dropped. Whoop! Ja!
Just because you’re a hardass marine fighting a grim war in the deserts of Afghanistan doesn’t mean you can’t lip synch an amazing performance of Britney Spears’ “Hold It Against Me”, which the woman herself has given her official shaved-head stamp of approval. They’ve got long careers as pop stars waiting for them when they get back home, because there’s more talent here than an entire season of American Idol.
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