This little girl will go a very long way in life. She will overcome many obstacles and achieve everything she sets out to achieve. She will accumulate more stuff than her peers and therefore be happier and they shall envy her and wish they had her stuff, but she will scoff and pretend she cares [...]
Little baby girls laughing at normal speed: cute and infectious, you watch them and unless you are an incurable cynic who is only happy when everybody else is miserable, you say awwwwww. Little baby girls laughing in slow motion: scary, creepy, unsettling and liable to haunt your dreams at the exact moment you were finally [...]
When Brits say she’s a spinner, they mean she’s deranged, unstable, prone to viciousness, hormonal, and not to be fucked with under any circumstance, however attractive she may be. A chick, basically.
This chick probably isn’t a spinner. In fact she looks pretty fucking cool.
Most people would look at this clip and say awwww, how cute. On the face of it, a kitten dozing off is very sweet. But as with most cuteness, an awful reality lurks, barely concealed, beneath the surface. This kitten is on the nod. If you have no idea what that means, go down to [...]
A pretty funky ad from one of the most annoying retail outlets in the world. For some reason, your brain short-circuits the minute you walk through the doors. Going into a Blockbuster and wandering around, unable to make any decisions, becoming increasingly imbecilised and panic-stricken, is akin to traveling the seventh circle of hell. Doing [...]
Beer ads are generally some of the best ads around - apart from lingerie ads and laundary powder ads. That’s probably because drinking beer provides inspiration in spades. If you don’t believe me, try drinking a lot of beer with your friends. You’ll find you come up with lots of very funny ideas. Now try [...]
It must be said that generally speaking it is better to have a mother than not. Unless your mother is an axe-murdering fiend. Or behaves like one. Which, come to think about it, most of them do.
Nothing is more nauseating than animals who come to the rescue of humans in cheesy TV films. It reflects a view of the world that wants everything to be nice and lovely and all God’s creatures to be sweet spirited and generous of heart. Which is thankfully complete crap. If we didn’t give dogs food [...]
And whilst we’re on the subject of kids, how come they’re programmed to destroy everything in sight? For all those people out there bored enough to even be considering procreating, this excellent ad tells you everything you need to know. It’s all here.
The Internet loves its kitties. In fact we will probably discover, 2000 years hence, that the Internet was created by kitties as a sort of big public relations device to ensure humans never got sick of kitties and started stamping on their little heads instead of feeding and stroking them. In fact, it will probably [...]
This ad looks quite clever, and at first glance, seems to make sense, but it’s obviously fake. The most glaring error is that, as everyone knows, goldfish have 5 second memories. How do you teach a beast with a five second memory anything, let alone a new language? You can’t, obviously. Also, have you ever [...]
Some things the internets does very badly. Verifiable facts for instance. But some things it does very very well indeed. Chief amongst these is insanity and kittens. TV can’t do insanity and kittens for shite, and radio is worse, which is why you’ll never see shit like this on TV. I’ll leave you work [...]
If you haven’t seen this video before, you are probably not worth knowing.
IT’S TOTALLY MATH!
The guy who we all think of as Paul McCartney, the one who just got burned bad by a mad one legged whore is not in fact the real Paul McCartney. What’s left of the real Paul McCartney is in a small box measuring 2 by 4 under Yoko Ono’s bed. True Story.
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