Aliens is a great action movie, trouble is you don’t always have a couple of hours spare to watch it. But you’ve probably got a spare 60 seconds, even if it does mean being late for that important meeting. Who cares? So sit back and watch the awesomeness of Aliens shortened to a mere minute and then go and do all that important stuff, like your job or whatever.
Claymation auteur Lee Hardcastle tells a story about a drug bust, a drug bust that goes horribly wrong and ends in Hardcastle’s trademark ultra-violence that’s bearable only because it’s being inflicted in the medium of clay. If this was live-action we’d all be puking our eyeballls out already, just like these characters.
It’s finally here, what we have all been saving our boxes of Kleenex for – after the time-killing first installment of ‘Cum Face or Axe Master’ had us all glued to our computers trying to work out whether the person was an axe grinder or an, ahem, ‘axe’ grinder, comes this sequel. See if you can use your God-given skills of observation to get all of them correct and achieve something worthwhile this afternoon at work, in between taking a nap and checking your Facebook page.
Your email inbox came often resemble scam city, with people asking your to store money for them or seeing if you want your manhood extended — it’s a total hoot. So this short film imagines what if all that unwanted spam wasn’t appearing in your virtual mailbox but at your front door instead. It would be enough to turn you insane with rage.
Everything you thought you knew about cats is explained in this video, like why they always land on their feet, why it lifts its tail when you pet it, the frequency which purrs occur and a whole bunch of other info. It tells you pretty much everything you need to know, except of course why we’re all so goddamn obsessed with them all. Not even the might of science can help explain that.
Monday hits us once again with news that life as we know it will never be the same again, the news that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Have Split will have young girls (and much older ones who should know better) the world over running to empty their Kleenex boxes and wondering how the universe can still exist. For the rest of us there is solace that, whatever sympathy we might have for the couple, we can finally say to ourselves ‘it’s still a better love story than Twilight!’ – Meanwhile here are some links to numb the pain.
- Puppet Movie Trailer Proposal – It’s love Jim, but not as we know it!
- Drunk Much? – Some things are best forgotten.
- Ryan Gosling Won’t Eat His Cereal – He’s a naughty boy!
- Running through white neighborhoods – This is total genius.
- How to Play Chess Properly – You’ve been doing it all wrong!
- Childbirth vs Getting Kicked in the Balls – It’s a difficult choice.
- Physics Student Owns Cop – Proof it’s worth paying attention in class.
- What if You Were Born in Space? – A Galactus-type cosmic question.
- Monday Morning Dump – The best of the weeks funny pics.
- How to: – This is How You Dance to the New Daft Punk Tune
J.J. Abrams is Charlie big geek right now, he can do no wrong, making awesome Star Trek movies that have found a mass audience, he’s at the helm of the Star Wars sequels which hopefully means no more Jar Jar Binks. And he’s also got an new TV show out set in 2048 about a cop who wakes up from a coma and has to pair up with an android and start unraveling some conspiracies.
If the guys have got Mickey Avalon’s “My Dick” then it’s only fair that the girls get a version that works for them. So step up Awkwafina and her lol-worthy track ‘My Vag” — and the vag she’s singing about is certainly unlike any other, it manages an incredible amount of stuff, from feeding the homeless to going to Harvard law school.
The current internet landscape and the brands and websites that sit at the top acting as cultural barometers are explored through the medium of 1990s toy adverts in this inventive music video. So Chrome and Firefox become toy robots duking it out and Anonymous and ACTA battle each other as toy soldiers. Even everyone’s fav torrent site The Pirate Bay and Megaupload make an appearance.
There was a time when Monopoly made from sticks and pebbles found in your back yard was all children had to choose from when it came to board games. My, how times have changed! Now you’ve got all kinds of demanding and vastly complex magical, fantasy-type games that seem to take up most of your life to play and complete. So who wants to go first?
For every happy-go-lucky lolcat making the internet sit up and notice it for a few seconds of their day, there are a million bazillion sad cats, the cats with the weight of the world lying heavily on their shoulders. Cats that don’t get lol-wut vids made about them, cats who haven’t even been filmed by their owner. This video’s for those cats. Amen.
It’s time for that ‘Friday Feeling’ as you slip into the weekend zone – Here’s another delicious dose of pictographic internet hilarity to help round out your week. Specially designed for the lazy web surfer, this gallery can be browsed using just your scroll wheel finger; simply scroll down, lol, then scroll down some more. Couldn’t be simpler!
Luke finding out Darth was his father, Ron Burgundy finding out Baxter is missing — two moments, if ever there were any, that require a long and drawn out “NooooooooooOOOOOOoooo!”. But it’s a staple of the movie world that comes up in pretty much every Hollywood movie worth its salt. So here’s a kind of symphony of “Noooo!”s from some classic movies.
When you choose a buddy, just make sure they are the real deal! Just like Buddy the dog, the good thing about him is that he’s the sort of pet you could get if your skills at looking after animals aren’t up to scratch. Like, you forget to feed them for instance. The bad thing about Buddy is that he’ll not give you the companionship that most people seek from a pet, that sense of interaction. You know, the fact that they’re actually the real thing!
A couple of Australians decide to prank call someone who calls himself a “private investigator”, who’s actually a car salesman, and it escalates pretty quickly into a war of words between them – Maybe these guys are doing a public service by outting these crazy people hidden in our midst. Or maybe we’d all go as batshit nuts as this guy and his wife, who takes the insanity up to 11, if we were called by a bunch of pranksters trying to aggravate us into a response. Either way, it’s still freaking hilarious.
And who said trolling isn’t an art form? Beat them round the head with balloons until you knock some sense into them. Here we see a guy trying desperately hard to study for his finals, but his roommate has other ideas. Ideas like throwing a stream of balls at the poor guy’s face and basically harassing him so much he’s unable to concentrate. But concentrate he does, like a total BOSS!
Just imagine if this was how soccer was played all the time, it would make it so much more awesome. When someone scored a goal, the celebration wouldn’t just involved them sliding along the pitch on their knees and screaming. But it would involve them sliding along the pitch on their knees and screaming while colored lasers shot out of their eyes and fire trailed behind them. Somebody make this happen NOW!
You probably don’t need it put into perspective how annoying Facebook’s constant updating of their privacy settings and template changes are. Suddenly everyone and their mothers can now see your updates and your activities–and companies can see them too so they can effectively market you, while all your favourite bits are reduced in size and repositioned. But if Facebook did exist in some kind of augmented reality world, this is how aggravating it would be. Grrrrrr!
Although the title says Lego Casino Royale, that is a bit misleading. Because it’s not the entire film put in Lego, instead it’s the black and white opening scene where Bond has a confrontation in the men’s toilets, but it’s all here, every frame painstakingly recreated for all the Lego enthusiasts and nerdlings out there. And it’s epic.
In case you spent April living in a cave with no broadband, not even dial-up, here’s a compilation of some of the best clips that the internet had to offer. You could basically spend your time outside running in fields and watching sunsets instead of sat glued to your screen and just watch this to catch up on what you missed. But that would just be weird, right?